Change
Michelle on Dec 23 2006 at 6:37 pm | Filed under: The Personal
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Last night, I was reading an interview in Sojourners with James Loney, who is a Christian Peacemaker team member who was held captive in Iraq for four months. In the middle of the interview, something he said really resonated with me.
“I imagined that our daily task was to build a Palace of The Present Moment, a refuge from our 11-foot square, paint-peeling room of never-ending gloom.
This, I began to see, is what it means to be born again. The present moment was the birth canal of incarnation.”
I am changing that last sentence a bit to “The present moment is the birth canal of incarnation.” When I read it, I think reincarnation. Part of who I am right now, the part of me that is agoraphobic, is unacceptable. It is a part that fears what the future may hold and wants to control it. But we can’t can’t control the future–all we can do is accept the present. Therefore, it is the part that must change.
It’s difficult.
Control? Ah, one of my issues with the world. I have fought this battle and lost many times. So, I have no advice except to keep trying to find the adventure in new places and things. I am always telling my girls about life lessons from hard things; I need to listen to myself better.
My Mum used to have a poster on her wall which had a poem, I can’t remember exactly so I’ll paraphrase. It talked about how many people live in the past regretting what has happened, and many others live in the future fearing and worrying about what is going to happen. But God’s name is not I WAS, or I WILL BE, His name is I AM. I guess that means that He is calling us to live here and now, with Him where He is. It is easier to say than do!
Anyway, wishing you and your boys a very Merry Christmas and I pray 2007 brings many blessings!
Hey, the last pleasant change I went through involved the diaper I was wearing! Yes, that agoraphobia one is fearsome….I know someone that suffers similarly. There is a way to push through it, however, I just know it and I know you will….oh wait…you ARE!